I think one of the major curses of trying to improve your fitness when you're not in the first flush of youth, you have the audacity to possess female secondary sexual characteristics in a public place *and* you aren't Jennifer Aniston is that every pillock has an opinion.
The people who love you are "Yay! Go for it! Good for you!".
However the rest are, I regret to say, a bunch of cosmic wank hats.
Today, when I was out for the first run I have done in many a year (doing walk/run intervals - 2.98 km, go me!), some "yoof" who appeared to be trying to impress a teenage girl, starting giving it "Run, Forest, Run", "You're meant to be RUNNING" - Me "Er, no I'm not, it's called interval training for a reason", "Your arse is wobbling and so are your tits!" etc.
Startling, I say, startling powers of observation there, mate. Also I hope your harassment of a random woman in sportswear, whose face is so red that she resembles a match, alerts your young friend to the fact that you are a complete douche canoe, and that she kicks you, unceremoniously, to the kerb.
So here is my retort.
Firstly, fat shaming is so effective at making people lose weight....er, no, it's not. (There's sound on the article so switch off if at work)
Secondary, being 40-odd, rather overweight, and currently built like a busty prop forward, I'd be bloody worried if those areas didn't wobble. On account of them being areas on the female body where fat is stored and because it would mean that I had become a slim bloke since leaving the house, and that, for me, as a cisgender woman, would be just weird. Either that, or I'd mutated into a gazelle.
I think we can all agree that that's kind of unlikely.
Thirdly, I'm seriously pleased with myself, because I went out for a run and did not expire.
Fourthly, I'm seriously pleased because none of my broken bits are playing up.
Fifthly, I'm doing this because I don't want my heart to explode, my bones to crumble to dust and maybe, just maybe, I might be able to wear dresses with an actual waist band again at some point. You know, so I can hopefully have an existence free from being riven with pain, and potentially, free from premature death. That harshes one's buzz somewhat.
Sixthly, I reserve the right to wobble, jiggle, ripple and even (if I'm in the fettle) undulate, where ever and when ever I bloody well like.
Seventhly, I possess a mirror and clothes therefore I possess enough self awareness to realise that I don't look like Jessica Ennis.
Once upon a time this would have put me off, now it's a challenge :)
After day 1 of the 30 day Plank and Arm challenges
So how am I today?
I got a walk in yesterday at a nice pace and not too many aches and pains. I did notice as I kicked off that there were new and unusual sensations deep in my glutes that I haven't felt for a while, but that might be down to the Mountaineers. (Edit: Mountain Climbers! I am a clueless nurk!)
One thing I would like to know is, does 1 leg count as one Mountaineer or does doing the exercise with both legs count as one. It would be bloody typical if I was doing too many and inadvertently ended up knackering myself in the process. Sometimes the various pieces of me that hurt are a strong argument for sloth.
Abs and core are tighter but not weeping, triceps are twinge-y but ok and nothing unpleasant to report, though let's see what happens tomorrow, after a repeat performance...
I got a walk in yesterday at a nice pace and not too many aches and pains. I did notice as I kicked off that there were new and unusual sensations deep in my glutes that I haven't felt for a while, but that might be down to the Mountaineers. (Edit: Mountain Climbers! I am a clueless nurk!)
One thing I would like to know is, does 1 leg count as one Mountaineer or does doing the exercise with both legs count as one. It would be bloody typical if I was doing too many and inadvertently ended up knackering myself in the process. Sometimes the various pieces of me that hurt are a strong argument for sloth.
Abs and core are tighter but not weeping, triceps are twinge-y but ok and nothing unpleasant to report, though let's see what happens tomorrow, after a repeat performance...
30 day challenges
I'm giving the 30 day plank challenge and the 30 day arm challenge a shot. This is alongside the walking. I've bought the app and I'm ready to shufty.
The reason I'm going back to basics and body weight exercises....well, basically my back keeps saying no and I think this may be a good way of fettling my core once and for all. I'm also not fond of my arms and any additional strength that I can get into them, especially as the little fella seems to have grown a lot lately, the better. (He's two, sometimes situations can get a bit "Judo" to stop him from doing things that are immediately injurious to his health!).
I do intend to return to the weights, it's just I can't help thinking that trying solely body weight exercises, then moving back onto the weights might be the way forward. Ultimately this is all trial and error. I don't mind the trial, but does there have to be so much error?
The reason I'm going back to basics and body weight exercises....well, basically my back keeps saying no and I think this may be a good way of fettling my core once and for all. I'm also not fond of my arms and any additional strength that I can get into them, especially as the little fella seems to have grown a lot lately, the better. (He's two, sometimes situations can get a bit "Judo" to stop him from doing things that are immediately injurious to his health!).
I do intend to return to the weights, it's just I can't help thinking that trying solely body weight exercises, then moving back onto the weights might be the way forward. Ultimately this is all trial and error. I don't mind the trial, but does there have to be so much error?
Also do you think I can walk 25 miles by the 31st January...watch this space!
Back with a sensibly paced and measured minor explosion...
In preference to a bang as I'd probably put my back out! In fact I have, so it's measured walking again, hey ho, that's how my fitness life goes. Rest, baths, Diclofenac,common sense, and I'll be back with the programme soon enough.
That said, it's been a funny old year, not least because I've been dealing with a health problem for some time that effectively scuppered my exercise plans, drained all my energy and put me in a funny old frame of mind.
If you've read this blog before, you'll know that I started another one called "Barley Free Living". Well, as it turns out, I'm actually gluten intolerant and it appears that that's been at the root of the IBS I've suffered from since 1996. Mercifully, I'm not Coeliac, for which I am very, very grateful.
When the barley problem really started to cause me a problem, (Allergic reaction - how wonderful) OH persuaded me that it might be a good idea if I consulted my GP to get some guidance, and to get checked out. As an experiment (and to eliminate the chance of cross contamination which actually caught me out once or twice) I went GF for a while. It was great. A number of grisly symptoms gone in a couple of days and the headaches and brain fog I'd had since my son was born (and before if I'm honest) went too.
What wasn't so great was the dietician that I'd been referred to suggested that I have an initial Coeliac disease test and that I have to start eating gluten containing foods again in order to the appropriate antibodies to appear in my blood stream. This involved actually eating more gluten containing foods than I had previously been eating.
Gluten "rechallenging" (A mimsy term if ever I've heard one) is rank. If I had blogged about it, you, dear reader, would have had to endure 6 weeks of me whinging about the parlous state of my hoop, gassy gurgling like a lava lamp with a major flatulence problem (for the Whovians amongst you, the Slytheen are a good reference point) and with a permanent headache. It's actually a good thing I was utterly devoid of any mental spring or energy, because no-one would ever read anything I've written ever again, so mired in self-pity was I. Never again. Gluten-free may be a major inconvenience (and I'm slightly bemused by people solely doing this as a lifestyle choice - one for people with more time on their hands than I have I suspect) but at least, I don't feel like I'm on the verge of bursting anymore. Literally.
Reader, you've had a lucky escape!
That said, it's been a funny old year, not least because I've been dealing with a health problem for some time that effectively scuppered my exercise plans, drained all my energy and put me in a funny old frame of mind.
If you've read this blog before, you'll know that I started another one called "Barley Free Living". Well, as it turns out, I'm actually gluten intolerant and it appears that that's been at the root of the IBS I've suffered from since 1996. Mercifully, I'm not Coeliac, for which I am very, very grateful.
When the barley problem really started to cause me a problem, (Allergic reaction - how wonderful) OH persuaded me that it might be a good idea if I consulted my GP to get some guidance, and to get checked out. As an experiment (and to eliminate the chance of cross contamination which actually caught me out once or twice) I went GF for a while. It was great. A number of grisly symptoms gone in a couple of days and the headaches and brain fog I'd had since my son was born (and before if I'm honest) went too.
What wasn't so great was the dietician that I'd been referred to suggested that I have an initial Coeliac disease test and that I have to start eating gluten containing foods again in order to the appropriate antibodies to appear in my blood stream. This involved actually eating more gluten containing foods than I had previously been eating.
Gluten "rechallenging" (A mimsy term if ever I've heard one) is rank. If I had blogged about it, you, dear reader, would have had to endure 6 weeks of me whinging about the parlous state of my hoop, gassy gurgling like a lava lamp with a major flatulence problem (for the Whovians amongst you, the Slytheen are a good reference point) and with a permanent headache. It's actually a good thing I was utterly devoid of any mental spring or energy, because no-one would ever read anything I've written ever again, so mired in self-pity was I. Never again. Gluten-free may be a major inconvenience (and I'm slightly bemused by people solely doing this as a lifestyle choice - one for people with more time on their hands than I have I suspect) but at least, I don't feel like I'm on the verge of bursting anymore. Literally.
Reader, you've had a lucky escape!
Barley Free Living
http://barleyfreeliving.blogspot.co.uk/
Here's a link to my new blog, where I'm boldly going to seek out foods with barley in, and put them on here so that I can avoid them myself and hopefully help out other people in the same predicament, especially those who don't have problems with other grains.
Here's a link to my new blog, where I'm boldly going to seek out foods with barley in, and put them on here so that I can avoid them myself and hopefully help out other people in the same predicament, especially those who don't have problems with other grains.
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